Talk:Javanese script/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Erachima (talk · contribs) 19:16, 13 August 2014 (UTC)

Since this is a rerun, I get to both do my own evaluations and look at the continued validity of issues identified by User:Tezero in Talk:Javanese script/GA1. Let's see how it goes.

Use of Images

Copyright statuses look fine, however

• The WP:GALLERY issue remains. Images on Wikipedia are intended to illustrate text, and the images which cannot be integrated into the body here should be trimmed. Readers who wish to see a gallery of images relating to the subject can find them via the Commons link.

Stability of Content

Non-issue.

Focus of Coverage

• Several of the images in the aforementioned gallery appear to refer to subjects which might be of significance but which are not discussed in the article. I can't judge the issue myself due to unfamiliarity with the topic, but consider if any expansions about artistic or literary use of the script are warranted.
• When the Japanese forbade use of the Javanese script, what did they promote to replace it?
• The section on Collation should clarify whether that poem is considered an Abecedarium, and if possible explain more of the history behind it.
• Most good articles about writing systems contain substantially more information regarding the development of the script over time than this one does. This area needs expansion.

Verifiability of Assertions

Sources which were previously identified as unreliable appear to have been cut and replaced, but the total number of referenced works has actually decreased. This is mildly disconcerting, and increases my suspicion that the article at present does not give a good overview of the whole subject.

Quality of Writing

Prose quality has grammatical issues. Most of the mistakes are common ESL errors that don't alter the ability to understand what's being said, so the best solution would be a quick copyedit by a native English speaker. In particular

• Subject-verb agreement is a persistent issue. "Rules determining the inherent vowel of a letter is described", "there are no aspirated consonant in modern Javanese", etc.
• Likewise, a number of sentences appear to be missing words, particularly articles and prepositions. e.g. "Swara is used differentiate proper names in [a] similar matter to murda."
• The section headers "Aksara", "Additional Aksara", and "Sandhangan" should probably be translated for the sake of navigation and to parallel the sections "Numerals" and "Punctuation". The headers would then be "Core letters", "Additional letters", and "Diacritics". Subheader "Pasangan" is fine the way it is.
• Later sections of the article depart from paragraph format, becoming very choppy and difficult to read.

Overall, due to significant concerns with the scope of the article and a failure to address problems identified in the previous GAN, I am forced to conclude that this renomination was premature and once again Fail the page. That said, if you do by chance significantly improve the article within the normal hold period, contact me on my talk page and I'll be willing to reassess it. --erachima talk 19:16, 13 August 2014 (UTC)